Almost exactly one year ago I started this blog. I'm sure that you've noticed that it's been a really long time since I've posted here. I apologize and also want to explain! I have good reasons. ;)
Not too long after I started this blog, I was contacted by Abby Rike Rockenbaugh. Much to my surprise she wanted me to be a part of the ministry she was starting. Believe me, I was surprised, confused, and completely sure she'd chosen the wrong person. We spoke on the phone and she told me the vision she had for the ministry. She told me about her Tribe. She told me the part she saw me playing in it as well. That included SPEAKING....PUBLICLY....at a conference about Bible Journaling. I was very overwhelmed and was pretty sure I should say no because if you know me, you know that this isn't a thing that I do. I don't go places, I don't speak publicly...I'm a background kinda gal.
But I remembered a few months earlier I applied to be a part of the Illustrated Faith creative team and was told no. Now, I didn't take it personally...okay, so I did take it personally but that's only because I have this problem of taking everything personally...I knew in the rational part of my brain (which is small, but it does exist) that it WASN'T personal. A lot of people applied and I just wasn't what they were looking for at that moment.
But it didn't keep my heart from breaking just a little anyways. I'm a stay at home mom and a photographer and those things are wonderful and I am blessed to have the opportunity to be those things, but I felt like I wanted a little more. I wanted to be a part of something, to be able to make a contribution. And in my heart, Illustrated Faith was what I thought it was going to be...but God had different plans. My OLW for this year was Trust...and I can see why God planted that little word in my mind for SO MANY reasons!
I prayed in the months following that "no' to be a part of something. I wanted to contribute. The thing was though, I didn't want it to be ME reaching out to someone else. I'd tried that and I kept picking the wrong things. I asked God, if I'm suppose to be a part of something...please have them contact me so I know that it's not me trying to force something.
A few months later Abby contacted me.
And I thought, "Oh....okay, well thanks, God but that's not what I meant though. I don't want to SPEAK in front of people. You know me better than that!"
But that's the thing. He knows me. He knows me better than I know myself and He knew that I could do it. He knew what I needed and He provided that for me.
So...where have I been?
So, you might wonder why I even have this blog at all if I'm not going to use it. Initially, I started this blog with the intent of writing the things that I have been writing over at RockThis.org (with some other wonderful women who often share their wisdom and hearts). So, I don't mean to abandon this blog but if you're ever looking for me you can probably find me there (and instagram of course!).
I have written blogs about
- how to start bible journaling
- supplies I love
- trusting God in the midst of pain
and one of my favorites.... - my son and Down syndrome
I invite you to come over to RockThis.org and read some of the wonderful blogs that these women have written!
I spent a weekend with them during the Rock This conference and I had such a wonderful time. I'm sure that they probably couldn't tell because I'm shy and awkward and don't talk a whole lot, but I did. I loved listening to them speak from the most honest and authentic part of their hearts. I loved getting to know and spend time with them.
I won't lie and say that I didn't feel like quitting quite a few times. I'm an introvert. I'm a doubter. I'm negative. I get overwhelmed VERY easily. I'm kind of even a loner. And I'm sad to say that the enemy really played on those attributes...often. Even sometimes while I was in the midst of being surrounded by all of these great women. But God helped me get through all of the muck. He protected me from the negative thoughts...and I am happy to say that my heart is feeling pretty good. I am a part of a great thing. I am honored to a part of this ministry.
I absolutely cannot wait to see what God has in store for it. I pray that you all will go to the website and explore. We even have a Facebook group (I'm pretty sure you can sign up to be a part of it on the website!). There's something for everyone there. We have a doctor, a bible teacher, an organization guru. Women that encourage, connect, pray, and love. I think you'll love them too.
So, anyways, that's where I've been!! That's probably where I'll be mostly! Please come join me there - > www.rockthis.org
xoxo,
Neely
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